First Class Squatters

Posted in A Day in the Life of a Flight Attendant | 5 comments

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In order to understand this post you have to know what “squatting” is, so here’s the definition straight from wikipedia:

Squatting consists of occupying an abandoned or unoccupied space or building, usually residential,^[1] that the squatter does not own, rent or otherwise have permission to use.

I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe I actually caught someone “squatting” in a first class seat. Who would do such a thing?

This particular passenger was boarded the aircraft in the last group. He made his right right over to 2D, put his bags in the overhead bin.. sat down and shut his eyes.

I didn’t think anything of it. When it showed up at the gate that morning the agent told me I only had two passengers seated in first class, but that number always changes. Usually by the time we begin boarding at least two to three more people have paid the upgrade fee and moved into the first class cabin.

As boarding completed the agent came down to the aircraft to help us with bins and bags she handed me the passenger manifest. I quickly glanced down at the names of the passengers seated in first class and noticed that there was only four names listed. I quickly thought, “oh, well, this manifest must not have been updated since the last passenger upgraded.” So, I proceeded to look at the timestamp on the top showing the exact time the report was prepared. It was printed one minute prior. I looked over the agent and said asked if I was supposed to have five people in first, and she shook her head no, but decided to double check. Over the radio we hear: “first class is 1A, 1F, 2A, 2F” But, there was someone in 2D.

So, I walk over to 2D, wake him up from his fake if-my-eyes-are-closed-you-won’t-talk-to-me sleep, and ask to see his boarding pass. He hands me a pass with seat 16D. I said to him, “I’m sorry sir but you’re seated in 16D, not 2D.” And he said “can’t I just stay here?” I said, “Sure if you want to pay the upgrade fee.” He asked “it’s like $100, right?” I said, “No, on a transcontinental flight its $270.” He said “how about $125?”

The nerve. “No, sir, you can’t bargain the price with me. Please move back to the main cabin.” He said, “wow.. you guys are good.”

We’re good? You knowingly sat in the wrong seat and figured no one would notice? Here’s a hint for you sir, I can count to four.

As he makes his way aft I called the back to let the FAs know that what he had done. Thankfully.

After he settled into 16D he was joking and talking with his friends on board about how he got caught then he pulled one of my flight attendant’s aside and said, “Bobby said that when the seatbelt sign comes off I can move back to first class, is that okay?” She said, not being briefed on the story yet, “if Bobby said it was okay, then yes.”

Well, he didn’t try to move. I think he knew better. But he did try to get items for free. During the beverage service he requested a “double vodka and grapefruit juice.” The flight attendant responded with, “well there are two things wrong here. First, we don’t have grapefruit juice and second you didn’t order the vodka. Once you pay for it. I’ll give it to you.” With a grunt and a sigh.. he paid for it.

To those first class/business/premium economy  flight attendants out there, beware! Check your manifest against the passengers seated in your cabin! Squatters aren’t just for realtor’s to worry about anymore.

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